Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Just Defending Myself

I'm living in the Twilight Zone...or an Alfred Hitchcock movie, or a Dean Koontz novel, or a Disney cartoon! It started last week. A BIRD, a Robin I think, has gone berserk! This big fat bird perches on my bedroom window and pecks at the glass to get my attention. He's got it! At first I thought, no big deal...just a crazy bird...making a nest...looking at himself in the glass....whatever! He starts this routine very early while it's still dark and continues off and on during the day. Now, here's where it gets weird! Are you ready for this? Get ready! You won't believe it!
As I ignore him and move on with my day he FOLLOWS me. Yep...I can go into my office and there he is, staring at me through the OFFICE window, peck, peck, peck. If I go into the dining room there he is, peering thought the DINING ROOM window. What's up with that??? Same thing in the living room. I'm sure it's the same dumb bird. He's watching me, circling the house looking for me! EGADS! I'm being watched. Is he a spy, a CIA agent, Big Brother with a camera in his beak? Is he going to turn into a vampire right out of the Twilight series? Well, he's dealing with the wrong person! I'm developing a plan of attack. Don't breathe a word of this to PETA, but this bird is going to "bite the big radish", "go out in a flame of glory", and "meet his maker". There will be no mercy. I'm putting on my cowboy boots and hunting for my gun! Where do we keep that water pistol? No jury will convict me! But, first I may need to sell tickets and invite the public to witness this bizaare behavior.
If I were to write a book about my observations of life it would no doubt be categorized as FICTION.

1 comment:

  1. Your story reminds me of my boys all time favorite book. (When they were little). It is about a bird that falls out of the nest and goes on a journey to find his mother. He confronts many people, animals and objects and asks, "Are you my mother?" Of course that is the name of the book. Wait till I tell my boys that the bird came to life and thinks Aunt Sharon is his mother. What a hoot! Love ya, Julie