Sunday, December 9, 2012

3D TV....WHAT????

We've moved into a new era!  Smart TV has arrived in our den. We've postponed this agony long enough, yesterday we pulled the trigger and shelled out the cash. (This news will delight our children and grandchildren, they think we been living in a cave with Fred and Wilma.)

So, we unpacked the thing and Honeybuns spent all yesterday afternoon and evening plugging things in and out of the back of it. 

It looks sharp, I must admit.  But, it is VERY smart AND intimidating!  We're going to need a 4 year old to come stay a few days to help us figure it out.

Late in the day a picture finally appeared on the screen, hurray!  Success!?!?!
Well, NO!

Evidently we are able to receive a few local TV channels, purely by the grace of God.  Our Direct TV receiver is so old that NO plugs, wires, USB's or bent paper clips will fit and thus a call was made to them. (YES, they answer on Saturday evening.)  The ever-so-patient man explained that we truly HAVE BEEN living in the cave with Fred and Wilma and technology has raced right by the cave door.  We were light years BEHIND the latest and greatest equipment.

An appointment has been made and an expert is coming to the house NEXT Saturday to, no doubt, spend a day or two.  I hope he brings his jammies, I'm sure he will be an overnight guest! He'll update all our equipment on the roof, in the attic and hook it all up new and fresh.  The Direct TV guy laughed and promised that when this transition was complete our new TV would all but cook dinner and clean the potties.

Well!  I'm looking forward to THAT!

While waiting for next Saturday, we've been playing around with the new remote, hoping to access all the bells and whistles, not having much luck.  BUT, it is a time-consuming activity.


This morning I woke up with a new plan.  There would be NO more new technology in our house.

After registering on Instagram this week, Face Timing the CO kids,  plugging in my phone and IPad, continually monitoring my text messages and Facebook account, I proclaimed the END.  This Smart TV has pushed me over the edge.  I simply have NO MORE time to spend with this technological addition!

We must go "cold turkey."  We must "shut it down," "turn it off," "unplug," and  return to a normal life!  The end!

Honeybuns agreed! 

A few hours after that proclamation and the freedom it gave, we stopped by Best Buy for an additional cable, one that would connect the Wii to the new Smart TV! (So much for the disciplined life!)

AND right there in front of the TV section of the store was the BIGGEST SCREEN I have ever seen. The picture was an underwater scene of blurry but colorful tropical fish.  The price was more than our first house!

SO much money for a really bad picture of fish!

THEN, Wah-La!  The salesman gave me a pair of magic glasses.  3D TV!!!!!  WOW!!!

Those fish literally JUMPED out of that skinny black box and headed right for my face! Incredible! I could feel the water on my face and smell the salt!   I was IN the ocean with those fabulous  fish swimming all around me. I reached out to catch the mantra ray bare-handed as he calmly swam out of my reach. It was an out-of-the body experience!

YEP!  3D TV is  reality! 

I'll be moving furniture to make room for that hulk of innumerable pixels!

I'm a sick woman, looking for a 12 step program to join!

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